Hope

I am unsure what to title this post.  Maybe a long road.  Lift is full of long roads and sometimes not so long roads.  I cannot make that walk for my children.  When they were little I could carry them.  But as they have grown my ability to truly carry their load is no more.  I can help, I can guide, I can give directions, but the walk?  The walk is their own.

Yesterday we took Rosie to a private girls school.  It was likely one of the hardest things I have ever done as a parent.  I watched Caleb walk away to the Army. I have stood at airports and watched him walk into situations that sometimes scared me, but he made the choice with sound mind and with good intentions and with good attitude.  It was his path!  I have taken my tough trio to hospitals and to treatment knowing the only hope sf behavioral modification, know I could not (we could not) be enough to help them.  It was sad, but like emergency surgery, necessary!  I have had children graduate from high school, go to college, I have stood and cried at those moments.  But those times are the purprose of a parents life, to lead thier children to adulthood and to success.

But Rosie?  As I stood there, I wanted her to choose better. I wanted her to want good and right and appropriate things.  But no.  I have never had a child that refused to obey (well, of course I have, but not as an entire life choice).  I cried for the losses she will have, the things that matter to ME. I cried for the relationship she will not have with family, but she didn't have that anyway.  I cried because I want so much for her and I believe she is capable of it all.

I have always told my children, "When our words are not enough?  We will find help".  I meant it.  Although this time it was the hardest "mean what you say" actions I have ever preformed.

As to the Academy?  We loved the administration. We loved the property. We loved the structure. We loved that God is the foundation and the meaning to every single day.  It is a good place. 

Teenage years are so critical.  The habits found will lead the future they have.  As I hugged my Rosie I was given hope. Hope that she will allow God to work His beauty on her heart.  Hope that her life as an adult will be so successful she can spend eternity with Him too! 

Hope.  We all need hope.  We are all promised hope.


"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints.."
                                      Ephesians 1:18
 So my post shall be "Hope".  Because without hope I would truly be lost today!