Far beyond the shadows darkening this,
And far beyond the sighing, moaning, and weeping,
Lies a summerland of bliss!
I so often get frustrated with "false sense of entitlement". Adults have it, teens have it, children have it and that "it" IS a serious problem today!
My teenagers/tweenagers think I exist to simply pour myself into them and their desires. I do take my responsibility as a mother seriously, I love my children far more than they can grasp. BUT no where does it state "give give give" to your children to make them happy.
Who on earth said happiness was the beginning and end of all conversations?? I'm actually loving me some Martha Washington as she was the one who said......
"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances."
What a smart woman!!Today Tasha wanted to make an appointment to take her permit test. I really don't think an appointment is needed to test for the permit portion but I sat down to look it up with her. I went to the TN Department of Transportation/Drivers Licence Bureau and as I began to pull it up Tasha started laughing at me because "I" (meaning mom) was sooooo wrong. She didn't need to take her "drivers license" she needed the "permit place" and mom was really dumb. As she laughed and made fun I stopped searching for it and closed the window. I turned and told her, "You are so obviously smarter than I am so you can take care of this yourself." She smartly (not intelligently, disrespectfully) said, "OK, let me on the computer." I simply said, "No, my computer, you figure it out yourself." She sashayed away (as my mother would have said) none the wiser. She has yet to get the understanding she so greatly needs.
Test taking is a PRIVILEGE not a right. Behavior is the KEY component to earning such a serious privilege and Tasha has yet to master her mouth to be anywhere near that privilege.
My children are full of ego right now (well, that's a thinking error as they are all not that way, just too many!).
Yesterday morning as we got ready to walk out the door to worship Ryan asked if he should bring his glasses case. I had to stop and think, not realizing where this was going with the question. I asked "why?". And he said "To put my glasses in." I looked at him, understanding dawning and replied, "Ryan, you have to wear your new glasses all the time. The only reason you would need to take your case was if you were going to play basketball and we don't usually play basketball in the middle of worship. The real reason is that you have made fun of others wearing glasses so this morning you can expect to be humbled."
On and on my "situations" could go...Sam threw a fit today as Tasha was talking about the permit test because he wanted to take his permit. I said no and did not even go there with him as he stomped off outside mouthing.
In the middle of all this silliness I am so often sad. Not in the depressed way but in the "You kids gotta get a grip on life" way!!
They have to learn to live in the beyond!! Think beyond their mouths. Think beyond their attitudes and bad behaviors. Think beyond this minute!!
Jesus had a whole lot of incredible parables....truly!! But, for me and my kids?? Most applicable to my not-nearly-as-entitled-as-they-think-they-should-be-kids?? The extra mile...that is the parable for them!
I have some kids who nearly go into cardiac arrest just thinking about being required to do anything! Chores? Surely someone forgot they were so special they should be exempt from anything as mundane as work!!
I expect the first mile to be done without thought (or if I were the Roman government DEMAND it done by law). So I suppose in my house the Smotherman law declares the first mile to be done first and without argument. Because arguing will not change the law but compliance makes you a good citizen of the Smotherman family!
Want to watch TV over the weekend? Want to go to a High School ballgame? Want company? Want anything?
The first mile is demanded of you.
The beyond? The extra mile? That is the mile where privileges are born! BTW...the second mile can ONLY follow mile one...that's why it's second of course!
Examples.....
First mile....Mom says unload the dishwasher.
Second mile(r)? The child who also loads it back and then starts it.
First mile....Clean your room
Second mile(r)? Also cleans parts that don't belong to them and might even clean the hall too.
First mile....Get your homework.
Second mile(r)? Does thier own and helps another person do theirs too!
First mile.... Mom asks you to please help bring in the groceries.
Second mile(r)? Makes more than one trip and asks if they can do anything else.
I think the point is clear....an extra mile's what I once saw described as the "Miracle Mile". I'm beginning to think that label applies to my kids! The first mile was the one was by law, but the second was a gift. To those who are carrying a truly heavy load? The offering of a second mile was a miracle to a Roman. In my house it's the quality that makes you above and BEYOND expectations.....that place is outstanding! And I have had lots arrive and maintain the second mile priveleges....and it did not require a miracle...just a little extra.
I want second mile kids!! I'm working on that pretty hard!! Somedays I think it'll take a miracle!! :)
LOve this post! Thanks. I think I'll remember the analogies...
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